A life to live

As of now I’m really not so sure of where my life is going to lead. I spent the last decade philosophizing my ideals and perspectives in life. Setting aside my frustrations and just living the life that I thought I was supposed to live. No plans, simply visions of what I can become. It wasn’t perfect but it was sound enough to say that I was existing.

Reality check, I became older I’ve learned to rationalize my actions and their consequences. I’ve come to accept that there are things in this life that you just cannot have. Hurting and disappointing as they may be. They are just proof that I gave them a shot and took risks. Even if I knew I wasn’t ready yet, even if in the eyes of others such was unacceptable.

I wouldn’t say that I live my life with NO REGRETS; however there are times I wish I could have done things differently. But hey let’s cut ourselves some slack, because after all life is not perfect.

 

 

 

#The Girl Today

Today a girl cried her heart out after quite a long time.
The last time she did was when she was 12 when the image she built of her mother crumbled to dust.

Back then she was everything the little girl ever wanted to be.

But that time the little things she didn’t know back then finally made sense and for the first time in her life she didn’t felt proud of being able to understand and she had no one to praise her anymore.

Back then when her father called she pretended to be strong and talk to him like she usually did.

But he saw past her pretence and he told her with his usual cheerful voice that everything will be fine and that even if he’s far away he would always love her little girl and that will never change.

That made her feel better and she promised herself not to cry nor love with all her heart she could not afford to go through the pain her mother put their family through not now that she knew better.

Six years after the girl cried her heart out again after talking with his dad through the phone.

He used to call everyday but things have change. He just remarried and perhaps he have change his priorities.

Though he still said she loves her it was with an indifferent voice and he ask her next about the things that she needs.

She kept her voice from trembling though her tears threaten to fall she felt that to her dad she was just an obligation he have to check on twice or thrice a week.

She felt sad and alone but she kept quiet and this time her father didn’t comforted her.

She knew it was about time his dad become happy and it was also about time she learn to stand on her own and there are things she need to get by on her own.I